PRICELESS FRIDAY

cost of emergency exam at dentist $60

cost of filling for 1 stupid lousy tooth $175

cost of meds to survive pain from tooth $6

realizing your gnome is a selfish jerk asshole....

FUCKING PRICELESS


As always, to be continued..............

HAPPY BIRTHDAY POST

Today is a special day for 2 very special people. First let me ask you all to please stop by Melody Ann at shoofly and give her a happy birthday shout out. There is a birthday post there for her that is pretty cool...while there, take a look at the gift I gave her..hee hee.

Today is also my dear gnome's birthday....the birthday post for Melody Ann has inspired me to steal the idea and do something similar for the gnome.

The following is a list of the first seven things I will do for the gnome when WE WIN THE LOTTERY :


1) buy my gnome a new car. After all every man deserves a hot car to drive while going through his mid-life crisis..lol (notice baby, I picked one in maple leaf blue..lol)


2) take a long trip on a secluded private beach where gremlins are NOT invited and clothes are optional...hee hee hee (really we are just gonna play crib people...lmao)

3) next fly to hollywood to go star gazing and then take a dip in the ocean....maybe we could meet "Jack Bauer" or "Homer Simpson"..lol

4) next I would buy an RV so we can drive across Canada checking out golf courses and bowling alleys as we go...the gremlins can come for this one...lmao.

5) Our next stop (after we ditched the gremlins with his parents..lol) would be to Paris to check out this purdy building and visit the city of lovers...

6) Once we were ready to move on, our next destination would be to pick up the gremlins and whisk them away to disney world and /or disney land...we would all have a blast I am sure....

7) of course, I saved the best for last... the single most important thing I will buy my dear gnome will be life time SEASON tickets for the Toronto Maple Leafs...this alone would be worth at least a week of back rubs I am sure...lol

So what do y'all think? would this be a good start? lol

To my dear gnome,

Happy birthday my love. The day I met you was the best day of my life . You have improved my life and filled my heart with love, in ways I never could have expected or hoped for. You are my soulmate and my heart would not be complete without your love. I am the luckiest woman to have you and I thank God every single day for bringing up together. I will love you forever and always, til the end of my life and beyond. You are my beloved.

love, ME

as always, to be continued.....................

HOCKEY NIGHT IN CANADA

Last night I was treated to hockey night in Canada first hand. The gnome is the BIGGEST hockey fan ever ...I could clarify that he is a HUGE fan of the Toronto Maple Leafs. Long story short is that we unexpectedly score 2 tickets to the leafs game last night. They were playing the dreaded Ottawa Senators and the gnome took me to my very first NHL game.

I am not really a hockey fan but I have tried to tolerate it because I know how much the gnome loves it and I love him. The game was surely interesting....it was a home game for Ottawa so we were surrounded by Sens fans. I will post more about it another time...but I did try to get some pics...so here they are...sorry they aren't better but we were up in the nosebleed section..lol.

This is the outside of the arena..though not a great pic the building is amazing itself :

These pics were being auctioned off. I would have loved to put a bid on the maple leafs one but the opening bid was $400...sorry dear gnome :

The 2 teams warming up before the game :

The national anthem...was totally amazing...the building was packed with more than 19,600 people in attendance:

This Canadian flag was unrolled by people during the anthem...there were actually rows of people under it holding it up...it was really cool :

2 teams playing hard :

The sens congratulating themselves after a good game...honestly the leafs sucked but the gnome really enjoyed it still :

The guy next to us was a diehard Sens fan. He was nice though and didn't seem to mind us screaming for the leafs and booing the Sens...it was interesting but not sure I would want to go again..lol.

As always, to be continued..............

GREMLINS...YA GOTTA LOVE ME

Happy Tuesday to everyone......

I have to post about something that happened to me yesterday.

As I have mentioned already, last week was not one of my better weeks....sometimes I forget that my dear gremlins are now old enough to pick up on things even when I don't talk to them about it...

of course I nag them regularly reminding them not to sm0ke...not to do drugs...and I remind gremlin #1 regularly that I think she should wait to have sex, but that she can talk to me about it when/if she feels pressured about that (gremlin #2 is 13 and still thinks girls are yucky..lol).

Anyway, when I am down and out I don't talk to them about what is bothering me...I just "suffer in silence" and accept hugs whenever possible...(and btw I am starting to feel better again)..the point of this entire rant is this.........

Yesterday, gremlin #1 asked for computer time and scrambled through her homework to get it......when it was time for her to shut it down so we could have supper and get ready for me to work, I yapped at her to get moving and didn't really pay attention to what she had been up to (which is TOTALLY not me normally when it comes to my gremlins and the internet).

Anyway, we got moving and I walked by my desk to find the pic below as my new screen saver..the lil bugger had spent her time making this for me to cheer me up....

What the heck do ya do with a gremlin like that...other than hug the stuffing outta her of course...kidssssssss..it does make a momma bear smile and feel fuzzy inside...lol.

As always, to be continued.............

MONDAY FUNNY

Here is a funny to brighten your day...hope it gives you a giggle like it did me...lmao.


The Farmer An Iowa Department of Highways employee stopped at a farm and talkedWith an old farmer. He told the farmer, "I need to inspect your farm for a possible new Road."

The old farmer said, "OK, but don't go in that field."

The Highways employee said, "I have the authority of the State of Iowa to go where I want. See this card? I am allowed to go wherever I wish on farm land."

So the old farmer went about his farm chores.
Later, he heard loud screams and saw the Department of Highways employee running for the fence and close behind was the farmer's prize bull.

TheBull was madder than a nest full of hornets and the bull was gaining on the employee at every step.

The old farmer called out, "Show him your card, smartass!!"

hee hee hee

As always, to be continued..........

DEPRESSION EXPLAINED

Well hells bells everything has become suddenly clear and I have had an ampithany tonight...

I thought I had been feeling depressed about work, gremlins being shitheads etc...but without meaning to, it has ALL been clarified by my dear sweet Corky.

I read this post and suddenly a light bulb has gone on and explained everything. I hadn't heard about the events that inspired this post, and I am still in shock.....

The trekkie in me in now in mourning...the girl that sat by the TV every single Saturday watching Star trek...who had a star trek calendar 3 years running...who watched every episode so many times that she could tell you what the entire episode was about after viewing only the first 20 seconds...it is this girl that has been down and out...

So thank you Corky for showing me what has been bothering me...you are an inspiration and a true trekkie leader...(and man oh man do you ever make good lookin babies....lmao).

As for the perpertrators of this "trek" crime..damn you one and all...

As always, to be continued.......

p.s. no I was NOT drunk or medicated while posting this...

(well maybe a LITTLE medicated...lmaooooooooo. Did I mention that the first thing that returns is my sick smartass sense of humour??? lol)

I'M BACKKKKKKKKK

I want to send out a big helloooooo and thank you to all that have send well wishes and thoughtful comments over the last week. They are appreciated more than you will ever know!!



I have missed you all greatly and I will be visiting your blogs over the next day or 2 to get caught up on everything I have missed this past week and I have so many things to share that I feel it trying to pour out of my fingers so fast I can barely keep up..lol.



I guess the most important thing to start with is an explanation as to why I haven't posted in a week....



I know there is more than one person that reads my blog that will understand when I say I have been depressed this last week. It is something that I have struggled with on and off over the last 25 yrs . I have been blessed that it isn't something I have had to be medicated for since I was about 20 (which was about 20 yrs ago..lol)



It is something that is hard to describe but these "bouts" of depression for lack of a better word are difficult mostly because I don't usually see them coming and sometimes it can be the silliest thing that gets the ball rolling.



We all have times in our lives when we are feeling blue or get discouraged...unfortunately these periods of depression are a bit more than that and are harder to shake off, for me anyway.



I was lucky enough to have a chaplain when I was younger that helped me a great deal. He listened without judgement, offered suggestions about how to deal with the issues from my childhood and gave me tools to use to help me pull myself out of these dark periods.



Almost 20 yrs later, I still here his voice in my head at times...thinking to myself "what would he say if I could talk to him now"....often just thinking about that helps me wrap my brain around what is bugging me...however this wasn't one of those times...



What set me off this time?? It was a stupid comment made by my STUPID boss...things are slow at my job right now and they have been slicing hours for the last few weeks..when my boss informed me of this (by email..the dumb chicken shit)...his reasoning for cutting my hours was that I am an "unacceptable employee"...



It wasn't just this label that caused this downtime, it was more like the straw that broke the camel's back....combined with my dear gremlin #2's decision to turn back into a TOTAL shithead the second he turned 13 (but that is another post in itself..lol).



Anyway, I spent most of the day sleeping today...when I woke up I smacked myself upside the head (literally) and said ok girlie, enough is enough...get your ass up and get back to life again...so here I am!!!! I am back to treading water like normal (whatever normal is..lol). It is times like these that really make me miss my river...that place that always makes me calm and serene no matter how badly I am struggling....

Anyway, I do thank you all again for your thoughts and kind words. I will be stopping in to see you all over the next day or so (I would do it right now if the gnome weren't here tapping his toes because he needs the computer..lol).

I apologize in advance for all the comments I will be leaving in my efforts to catch up...just remember they are posted with love.

As always (now that I am among the land of the blogger-living again), to be continued.............