Thursday, June 7, 2007


Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied. "Two years older than me."
"So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?

Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

For some reason lately, my thoughts have been with my Mom,who I miss greatly. I think I have mentioned before that last summer we moved away from the city I have lived in all my life, due to my husbands job. It was not an easy decision to make, mostly because of my Mom, but I knew it was the right thing to do for my family, and more importantly for my husband. He had been commuting, driving an hour each way, for almost 5 years, and it was starting to seriously affect his health (not to mention the price of gas killing us too..lmao).

When I get feeling blue, missing my Mom (as I am right now) reminds me how odd life's twists and turns can be. When I was young, for a long time I truly hated my Mom. I felt like she could have protected me if she has just USED her brain and tried...but instead she chose to be clueless and turn a blind eye. It took a LONG time for me to forgive her..because even when I told her what happened to me, she chose to stay with him....which to me as a Mom now would be unthinkable. She had a good job and all of my siblings had already moved out on their own, so she could have escaped with me and protected me from "the devil"'s wrath but took the coward's way out and stayed.

I was raised my a Mom that I have always referred to as "slap happy"...when she felt I did something wrong, she would hit first and ask questions later...

All that being said, I will again state that I love my mother completely and unconditionally. I am so glad that I managed to find the forgiveness in my heart that allows me to truly love her, appreciate her and miss her so terribly. The real turning point in our relationship was when I got brave enough to be able to tell her "Mom you ARE being a butthead so cut it the hell out!!!" That seemed to change our relationship from mom-daughter to more like mom-adult.

She is 71 now and is a diabetic that has had a heart attack a few years back, so I do know that we have reached that point in our lives where her time on earth could be dwindling. I won't let myself dwell on that, it just serves to remind me to appreciate every hug,kiss,conversation I have with her because they are priceless. As I said, it makes me shake my head to think about how I have gone from hating her with everything I had in loving her more than I ever thought I could...and I could not imagine my life without her... hope my gremlins feel the same way when my time comes...

As always, to be continued..........


Burfica said...

They feel that way now I'm sure. We all feel that way deep deep down, just takes a long time to realize or surface.

For all the thinks I was mad at my mom about, saddened by, and even highly disappointed by. For all the times I didn't really like her. I loved her hugely. You never really know how much till you lose them though.

Canadian flake said...

fica- welcome back to the world of blogging. I am sure losing your Mom was really hard but have to say I am lucky in that I don't agree with your last comment...I DO know how much she means to me. It is a shame not everyone is that lucky I guess..